Surprises in a Bundle
by Khyie
Summary: Um... What happens when Ellone has a power flux and summons the Squall and Seifer of the past to the present? Good enough? It's yaoi and somewhat PWP. But it's my first fanfiction so I get away with it ;P
1. L. Squall and L. Seifer

(It is a quiet night at Edea's house. The moonlight filters through lacy green curtains clawing it's way across the dark green bed and the two naked figures upon. They are oblivious to it's needing grip and move gently against one another, murmuring softly to themselves.)

Seifer: Mmm... Squall... A little lower please... Oh! Oh yes... There!

Squall: *smirks* You like that, do you?

Seifer: *gasps* Oh god, yes, harder, please, harder!

Squall: Shhh... *glances around furtively* They'll hear you.

Seifer: Fuck them, Squall, damn it. Fuck me.

Squall: *raises a brow* I don't think I will. *pulls away*

Seifer: Bitch. *grabs onto Squall and pulls him back, tilting his chin so that he can kiss him.* You will.

Squall: Why should I?

Seifer: Why shouldn't you?

Squall: Because your ego will swell up even larger.

Seifer: *smirks* So? *begins kissing him once more*

L. Squall: Um... Hello?

Seifer: *blinks pulling away from Squall* Squall... There is a kid at the foot of our bed.

Squall: I can see that... It looks...

Seifer: Like you did as a kid?

Squall: *nods slowly*

(Both young men stare at the boy standing at the foot of their bed. He stares back at them with a somewhat rebellious expression. He is wearing a yellow shirt with an orange stripe across the middle and jeans. His hair hangs in his face and he peers up through it at them. They are suddenly joined by another child. This one has blond hair that hangs in one eye and bright blue eyes. He looks smug)

L. Seifer: Hah! Found you!

L. Squall: *wrinkles his nose* Yes. You did.

L. Seifer: *grabs L. Squall's arm and leers* Guess what that means?

Squall: *jumps out of bed, oblivious to his nakedness and snatches L. Squall up* Leave him alone.

L. Seifer: *glares at him* And who are you?

Squall: *sweatdrop*

L. Squall: *clutches onto the ends of Squall's hair* My daddy.

Squall: *looks as if he's about to faint* D-Daddy...?

Seifer: *guffaws* Hah! Squall's a parent!

Squall: *gives him the evil 'ice prince' glare* Go to hell.

L. Seifer: *looks at Seifer in distaste* And who are you, dirty old pervert?

Seifer: *stops laughing and blinks* Why you little shit...! *jumps out of bed, intending murder on the little blond boy*

Squall: *innocently sticks out a foot*

Seifer: *trips on it, falling on his face*

L. Squall: *scrabbles out of Squall's arms and grabs L. Seifer tugging him out of the room at a run*

Seifer: *sits up, blowing hair out of his face and glares after the kids*

Squall: I think... We need to talk to Edea.

Seifer: *scowls* I think I need to knock that little shit's face in.

Squall: *gives him a cold stare*

Seifer: WHAT?!

Squall: He's right you know.

Seifer: *growls and leaps, taking Squall down underneath him*

Khyie: O.O I think we all know what happens now... So... Scene switch.

Dark: You just can't write a lemon.

Khyie: Go to hell. Neither can you.

Dark: o.O I'm not going to ever attempt it either. I've got better things to do... Like stealing stuff.

Khyie: Shut up or I'll sic Krad on your ass. 

Dark: *wide eyes* No... Please... Anything but that!

Khyie: Mwahahaha! I win!!! *pulls out big white screen that has Scene Switch written on it with bold black lettering*

(It is the next morning. The sun has come up, shedding it's bright rays where the moonlight had formerly been. This time the two forms aren't moving. Seifer is halfway off the edge of the bed, on his back, a small trickle of drool falling from his mouth as he snores. Squall is flat on his stomach, clutching the large pillow to him. The door is abruptly flung open and hits the wall with a loud bang. Both Squall and Seifer sit up, instantly awake. L. Seifer prances in, wearing a black shirt similar to the one Seifer always wears under his trenchcoat and black pants)

L. Seifer: 'Dea says you need to drag your lazy asses out of bed, especially you, you dirty old pervert.

Seifer: Little shit. *once again attempts to murder the younger blonde*

Squall: *tackles him* Leave him alone!

L. Seifer: *looks down at Seifer coolly* You got taken down by a feminine wimp? Boy, you suck. *he turns and saunters to the door where he pauses to look back* I would suggest putting on some clothes before you come. I mean, we both know your small but I doubt the whole orphanage needs to know.

Seifer: That little fucking shit! *struggles against Squall throwing him off and charging into the hall* EDEA!!!!!

Squall: *hits the edge of the bed, blinking a little as he stares after Seifer**he shakes his head and stands up going to his dresser to throw on some clothes*

Seifer: *comes charging in a moment later, a large red handprint on his cheek and chest heaving*

Squall: *finishes putting on his last belt and bomber jacket before giving Seifer a dispassionate look* Ran into Quistis?

Seifer: No. Selphie, damn it. *he scowls at Squall*

Squall: *shrugs* Your own fault. Should've listened to the kid.

Seifer: *roars* I WILL NOT TAKE HINTS FROM THAT LITTLE BASTARD!!!

Squall: Your loss. *pushes past Seifer, heading downstairs*

(Scene switch. Edea's dining room. A tired looking Quistis in a green suit is sitting there with an offended Selphie in a pink outfit similar to Quistis's usual, a satisfied Irvine, a wide eyed, chirpy Rinoa, an awake but unhappy Zell, L. Seifer and L. Squall. L. Seifer is flinging sausage bits at L. Squall and L. Squall looks like he's about to haul off and deck L. Seifer at any moment. Squall enters and takes a seat next to L. Squall followed a moment later by a dressed but pissed Seifer who takes the only seat left: between Squall and L. Seifer)

Squall: Anyone here know what's up with them? *he points to L. Squall and L. Seifer)

Quistis: A time flux. Ellone had some problem with her powers and they appeared.

L. Seifer: *stabs Seifer with his fork and snickers*

Seifer: You goddamned, mother fucking, little shitfaced--

Edea: *from the kitchen* SEIFER ALMASY! NOT IN FRONT OF THE LITTLE KIDS!

Khyie: I think I spelt his last name wrong... Oh well... Too lazy to go make sure...

Seifer: *glares mutinously at the kitchen door then at L. Seifer but does nothing more*

Squall: *stares crosseyed at the spoonful of oatmeal being offered to him by L. Squall* Um... That's okay but I don't like oatmeal.

L. Squall: Don't you? Edea says your me. I like oatmeal so therefore you must like oatmeal too. *he insistently offers the spoonful to Squall*

Squall: *sighs and takes the spoonful into his mouth*

L. Squall: *seems pleased and goes back to eating the oatmeal by himself*

Edea: *brings out two plates and places them before Squall and Seifer* Eat well. *she cheerfully heads back into the kitchen*

Quistis: So, how did you sleep last night?

Squall: *pauses the fork that was heading for his mouth and stares at her*

Seifer: Damned shitface--

Edea: SEIFER!

Seifer: *winces* I mean... The kid, little Squall, came into our room... Followed by that little... _thing_. But it was only for a few minutes.

Squall: It kept him up most of the night, ranting about how much he despised children.

Seifer: EDEA!!! THAT LITTLE BRAT JUST STABBED ME WITH HIS FORK!!! AGAIN!!!

L. Seifer: *sticks out his tongue* Tattletale.

Seifer: Demon.

L. Seifer: *smirks* I know. Isn't it lovely?

Seifer: *glares* Damnably annoying is what it is.

Quistis: *raises a brow* At least you didn't have it as bad as I did. They decided they were going to sleep in my room. Or... More like... Stay in my room. I don't think they went to sleep at all last night.

L. Squall: *looks up* Oh, we did.

L. Seifer: After I molested him long enough.

Selphie and Irvine: *chokes on their food*

L. Squall: YOU DID NOT!

L. Seifer: I DID TOO!

L. Squall: DID NOT!

L. Seifer: DID TOO!

Squall: *sweatdrop* We were like that as kids?

Seifer: *nods sadly* Yep.

Squall: I feel bad for Edea.

Seifer: ... *smirks* I don't. Just makes me proud to know I haven't changed much.

L. Seifer: *stabs Seifer with his fork* Idiot! We aren't alike!

Seifer: EDEA!!!!

Squall: *sighs* Some people never change.

Quistis: *pats his back pityingly and nods* Some never do, either.

Edea: *comes into the dining room, frowning* Squall, Seifer, I'm sorry but I just don't have time to take you to the ice cream parlor.

Squall and Seifer: *blink, staring*

Squall: Wtf?

Edea: *glares* Squall!

Squall: What?! I said W-T-F...

Edea: You're teaching the children bad things.

Squall: *hits his head on the table.*

L. Squall: *pushes Squall's head up and climbs onto his lap* That's okay. Daddy can take us.

Quistis: *blinks* Daddy...?

Squall: *shrugs* I... Suppose.

L. Seifer: Yay! Dirty old pervert's ho is taking us to the ice cream parlor!

Edea: SEIFER! *whacks Seifer over the head*

Seifer: *winces* What'd I do?!

Quistis: *stares at L. Seifer* That's just wrong...

Selphie: *nods, staring as well*

(The scene switches to an ice cream parlor. It's one of those with the white walls and pink and blue decorations. It's empty except for an old couple in the back and two teenage boys at a booth seat. The boys are snickering softly to themselves. One has black hair that seemed to have a reddish tint in the sunlight from a badly done dye job and falls to his waist and cat shaped poison green eyes. The other was pale with brown hair that barely scraped his shoulders, tinted red in the light, and tarnished forest green eyes. A rather large woman with a wart on her nose, trashy brown hair, and shirt unbuttoned a bit too far is behind the counter chewing absently on some gum with loud cracking noises)

Kohl: *points to drawing on table* That's all your fault.

Naolith: *cackles to herself glancing at Kohl with forest green eyes*

Kohl: See? You _are_ a bad influence on me! *he reaches across the table, reddish black hair falling over his shoulder in waves and hugs Naolith* I love you.

Naolith: *hugs back* I love you too.

L. Seifer: *sneers* Aw look. Kodak moment.

Kohl: *glares*

L. Squall: *hits L. Seifer over the head* Leave the gay guys alone!

Squall: Oh dear God... Why didn't I guess this was going to turn into one of _those_ trips. *he hustles the children over to the counter to order*

Meredith: So, what can I get you boys? *heaves herself off the counter*

L. Squall: *blinks rapidly* Two scoops of chocolate...

L. Seifer: *gives her a contemptuous look* Three scoops of vanilla.

Seifer: *unconsciously gives her the same contemptuous look that L. Seifer is* Three scoops of vanilla.

Meredith: *turns to Squall* And you, young lady?

L. Squall: THAT'S NOT A LADY! THAT'S MY DADDY!

Squall: *sweatdrop* Ah... Two scoops chocolate, please.

Meredith: Hn. Okay. *scoops out their ice cream and hands it to them*

Squall: *quickly pays for it with the money given to him by Edea and ushers the kids to a booth seat* Squall, you shouldn't shout like that.

L. Squall: Why not? She called you a lady.

Squall: *looking a bit disgruntled but patient* I often get called lady. You're going to have to learn to put up with it.

L. Seifer: Yeah, girly boy, learn to put up with it.

L. Squall: *looks like he's going to start crying*

Seifer: *whacks L. Seifer on the head* Leave the kid alone.

L. Seifer: *glares then using extreme skill, dumps one of his scoops onto Seifer's lap*

Seifer: *jumps up, using a few inventive swears as he hops around and looks like he's about ready to murder L. Seifer*

Squall: *gets up* Seifer, come on, calm down. He's just a kid.

Seifer: He's not a kid. He's a little shitfaced DEMON!

L. Seifer: *sticks out his tongue at Seifer*

Seifer: Damned monster...

L. Squall: *oblivious to the fighting* Daddy, can we go see a movie after this?

Squall: *mutters under his breath* I'm not your damned daddy *out loud* No, Squall. I'm broke and Edea didn't give me enough money for that.

L. Squall: *wide gray-blue eyes start filling with tears as he looks up at Squall*

Squall: *begins backing away* Oh God... No... He wouldn't...

L. Seifer: *wide eyes* He would. Start pooling your money people. *pulls one gil from his pocket and sets it on the table*

Seifer: *sighs and pulls four from his*

L. Seifer: *snatches back his one* We can go.

Seifer: *sticks out his tongue* Little shitface.

L. Seifer: Dirty old pervert.

Squall: *quickly snatches the money from Seifer's hand and begins pushing everyone out the door*

Meredith: *waves* Have a nice night, lady! And take good care of that cute blond husband of yours and those adorable kids!

Squall: *glares at her, askance* It's bad enough when they mistake me for a lady... But you for a husband and these demons for kids???

Seifer: *snickers* I think it's kind of cute. Give me a kiss my lovely wife*

Squall: *whacks him along side the head* Idiot! We're in public!

Seifer: And everyone thinks you're a girl. *grabs Squall and kisses him hard*

Squall: *stiffens, eyes wide*

L. Seifer: *looks at them, looks at L. Squall, then looks back before furtively pecking L. Squall on the cheek*

L. Squall: *glances at L. Seifer* That's all?

L. Seifer: *blinks then snickers before grabbing L. Squall in an almost perfect mimic of the way Seifer had grabbed Squall and pulled him in for a deeper kiss*

Squall: *pulls away from Seifer and snatches up L. Squall* Damn it, Seifer! Look at what you're teaching the kids!

(A few moments later on the way to the theater...)

L. Squall: *leans toward L. Seifer and whispers* I don't have the heart to tell him we've been doing this for years.

L. Seifer: *snickers*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Khyie: Yesh... As claimed.... This is my first fanfiction. Much thanks goes out to Midnight and Kaixiangyin for all their support and Midnight especially for her help. Yesh, we did get to be gay guys. D


	2. Kohl's Revenge

(The movie theater is just staring to darken when the four scoot into their seats. It's mildly crowded but not enough so that they can't get decent seats. Seifer takes a seat the farthest from L. Seifer so it goes like this from L to R: Seifer, Squall, L. Squall, L. Seifer. The previews begin rolling.)

L. Squall: *frowns* What are we seeing?

Squall: *absently* Resident Evil.

L. Squall: *bites lip* What's that?

Squall: It's a movie based off a game.

L. Squall: What game?

Squall: *impatiently* Resident Evil.

L. Squall: Is it scary?

L. Seifer: *leans over* Terrifying.

L. Squall: *whimpers softly* Daddy... I want to go...

Squall: Don't worry, Squall, I'm sure it's not as scary as the game. Seifer's only trying to get a rise out of you.

L. Squall: *wide eyes* O-Okay, Daddy.

Seifer: *leans over to Squall and whispers* Are you sure about that?

Squall: *annoyed* Yes, Seifer, I'm sure.

Seifer: Good, because I remember a certain little brunette who flipped out and ended up in my lap during Nemesis and he wasn't even the one playing.

Squall: *glares*

(The previews end. The movie has been playing for a good ten, fifteen minutes-give me a break. I saw it like, last month... I think-when the first 'scary' part happens)

L. Squall: *lets out a positively terrified yelp and buries his face in L. Seifer's shoulder)

Squall: *grips Seifer's arm, eyes wide*

(The movie continues. By the time it has progressed to when we first get a glimpse of the Red Queen, Squall and L. Squall are completely terrified.)

Squall: *face is buried in Seifer's neck, his hands snarled in his shirt and is sitting on his lap, whispering repeatedly like a chant* I hate this movie. I hate this movie. I hate this movie.

Seifer: *slowly, soothingly strokes Squall's back, eyes glued to the screen* Kick ass...

L. Squall: *is sobbing helplessly into L. Seifer's shirt, hands clenching and unclenching around the light material. The whole front of the shirt is soaked through with tears*

L. Seifer: *comforts L. Squall, murmuring soothing nothings into his ear as his eyes dart back and forth from the screen to the boy* *he is suddenly hit with a bunch of popcorn* *he turns and glares, offended*

Kohl: *mockingly* Aw, look, Naolith. A Kodak moment.

Naolith: *glares at L. Seifer*

Kohl: *snickers and turns his attention back to the screen, having had his revenge*

L. Seifer: *mutters* Damn gay guys...

(The movie ends. They are outside looking for Seifer's car)

Seifer: That had to be the stupidest movie I have ever seen.

L. Seifer: I dunno. The dead people were kind of cool looking. I want to see it again.

L. Squall: *shivers* I hated it.

Squall: *bites his lip, considering* I want to see it again.

Seifer: *smirks* I wouldn't mind seeing it again as long as you are there.

Squall: *blank look*

L. Seifer: *mutters* Pervert.

(A small distance away...)

Kohl: That movie sucked...

Naolith: You got your revenge.

Kohl: So what? The movie still sucked. I want more revenge just because I spent four dollars on such a retarded film.

Naolith: Kohl... You're going to end up stalking that kid for the rest of his life if you keep up on that vein.

Kohl: *eyes begin to glow* I don't care... *lights flare and he strikes a pose* I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!

Naolith: *winces* Kohl... That's some pretty damn cheesy lighting that you got for that scene.

Kohl: *blinks and drops the pose. The lights wink out of existence* Oh...

Naolith: *sighs* Why do I have a really bad feeling about this?

Kohl: *grins and grabs Naolith's hand* C'mon or we're going to lose them...

(The next day at Edea's house L. Seifer and L. Squall are standing in a rather secluded hallway, away from prying eyes... Well... Most prying eyes. Squall and Seifer are trying to subtly sneak over and hear their conversation. Seifer is kneeling next to the wall and Squall is trying to lean over him and see around the corner to see what's going on)

Squall: *scowls* Damn it, Seifer, we have to get closer... I can't hear anything.

Seifer: *growls* We're as close as we can get without being caught, Squall.

L. Seifer: *says something and takes L. Squall's hand*

Squall: *leans over Seifer, scowl deepening* Seifer...

Seifer: Sh... Damn it, Squall, get back or you're going to fall over and blow the whole plan.

Squall: Oh, shut up. What are you? My mother?

Seifer: *rolls his eyes and once more peers around the corner*

L. Squall: *pulls his hand away. He is holding a small green object*

L. Seifer: *says something once more and grins*

L. Squall: *a small smile spreads across his face*

Squall: *snorts* Oh please, Seifer. They're just... standing there. What could they possibly be doing?

Seifer: *seriously* Plotting my imminent destruction.

Squall: *blinks then rolls his eyes* Get a grip, Seifer. They're just kids. *turns and starts to walk away*

Seifer: *reaches out and snatches Squall's ankle*

Squall: *falls over* *turns over and glares at Seifer*

Seifer: *stands up and smirks down at Squall* You know, if I wasn't so concerned about the kids, I'd take advantage of that position.

Squall: *glares the crawls around Seifer to peer down the hall*

L. Seifer: *grabs L. Squall's arm*

L. Squall: *leans over and places his lips on L. Seifer's*

L. Seifer: *wraps his arms around L. Squall and pulls him closer*

Squall: *eyes widen* That little... *gets up and marches down the hall before Seifer can stop him and snatches L. Squall up*

L. Squall: *blinks, startled*

L. Seifer: *glares at Squall*

Seifer: *marches down the hall after Squall* Damn it, Squall. You just had to-

Squall: Shut up!

Seifer: *blinks, pausing*

Squall: *glares at L. Seifer then spins on his heel and exits the hall, still carrying L. Squall*

Seifer: *stares after him then looks at L. Seifer* What the hell did you do?

L. Seifer: *smirks* Kissed him.

Seifer: *smirks back* Way to go.

L. Seifer: *snickers* Yeah, now if only I could get Mr. Possessive Daddy away from him...

Seifer: *considering look* I'll make a deal with you. You quit calling me dirty old pervert and I'll keep Squall out of your hair.

L. Seifer: *disbelieving look* Oh really?

Seifer: Really.

L. Seifer: *grins* Okay. It's a deal. *holds out his hand*

Seifer: *takes it and shakes, a triumphant smirk twisting his features* *thinks* This should be interesting...


	3. My Mistake

Khyie: ACCIDENT!!!!!! I feel the need to correct a mistake that seems to have been made. It was brought up by Romilly McAlan who I thank for reminding me that I didn't do say so. I'm used to putting up stuff on HP where you get to put down author's messages and the like after the fic and I'm not used to actually writing my messages on my stories. Um... The idea for 'Surprises in a Bundle' is not unique. I had no intention of claiming it was. It _was_ while scanning the 'net and looking at doujinshis that I came up with the idea for the story. Yes, it was the little kids with the elders. Yes it was in Japanese (rubbed in my damned lack of ability to read the language too). Um... Let's see... Ah, yes. Kohl belongs completely and entirely to me. *huggles Kohl* He even looks like me D. Naolith belongs completely and totally to a friend of mine *huggles Midnight and Naolith*. She doesn't belong to me (unfortunately. I would make her my fashion bitch for real if she did). Hm... What else...? Oh. Yeah. Heh... This fic was actually a kind of spur of the moment idea so don't be surprised if there are long pauses between the rest of the chapters. I don't have anymore inspiration although I bet I could get plenty from my friends.

Dark: You're forgetting something.

Khyie: I am?

Dark: It comes with not being used to writing fanfics... *nudges and points to a large sign*

Khyie: *blinks* Oh yeah... Disclaimers... I don't own FF8. I don't own any of the Seifers or the Squalls or anyone except for Kohl. Please don't sue me. Everyone else can claim they have nothing. I DO have nothing. The computer I'm typing this on doesn't even belong to me. I think, the only thing that belongs to me, is my deadjournal and that doesn't even count cuz www.deadjournal.com isn't even mine.

Dark: Yeah, yeah, blah, blah. Shut up.

Khyie: Go away!

Dark: *waves hands* I'm going, I'm going.


	4. More of Kohl's Revenge...

(A week later at Edea's House…)

  
Squall: *peers around the corner, looking for any glimpse of a blonde head. Seeing none, he drags a rather amused L. Squall across the living room and seats him in front of the tv*

  
L. Squall: *after deliberately long thought* I want to watch Dragonball Z.  
  
Squall: *stares at him making a face* Oh, c'mon kid, haven't you outgrown that stage?  
  
L. Squall: *firmly* DBZ or I'll scream for Seifer.

  
Squall: *sighs, defeated and goes to find a DBZ tape, muttering* The things I do to keep myself from being molested by overbearing, perverted blondes.

  
(And then…)

  
L. Seifer: *scowling* Look, we've been through here three times already with no sign of them. They aren't going to miraculously appear.

  
Seifer: *glares* Shut up, brat. Squall can only avoid the television for so long.

  
L. Seifer: You make it sound like he's addicted.

  
Seifer: You're from further back than I thought, otherwise you'd know he is addicted.

  
L. Seifer: *snorts*

  
Seifer: Look, okay, he'll show up eventually. I mean, it's Squall for God's sake. *he enters the living room and pauses* Like now.

  
Squall: *is sprawled all over the couch in a position that might've been awkward had it been anyone but him, on his back. He is fast asleep*

  
L. Squall: *is lying on Squall on his stomach, one hand curled up in his shirt, the other tucked under his cheek. He is asleep as well*

  
L. Seifer: *frowns*

  
Seifer: You owe me a gil.

  
L. Seifer: What?!

  
Seifer: SH! *clamps a hand over L. Seifer's mouth and smirks* You doubted me. Therefore, you owe me a gil.

  
L. Seifer: Go to hell. *goes over to the couch and nudges L. Squall*

  
L. Squall: *eyebrows draw together and he mumbles something waving a hand in L. Seifer's general direction before turning over*

  
L. Seifer: *frowns in annoyance and shakes L. Squall's shoulder*

  
L. Squall: *tosses back over with a small groan and smacks him*

  
L. Seifer: *falls back, startled and stares at L. Squall, clutching his cheek*

  
Seifer: *sighs* Wuss. *lifts L. Squall up and carries him through the patio door, placing him on the grass among the flowers*

  
L. Squall: *sighs softly, snuggling into the grass*

  
Seifer: *to L. Seifer* He's all yours. Now leave me the hell alone. *goes back in and picks up Squall, carrying him into their bedroom*

  
L. Seifer: *lays down beside L. Squall and wraps his arms around him, allowing the gentle sway of the grass and the warm sunshine to lull him into sleep*

  
(Meanwhile, a little distance away, sitting on the shore with papers spread around him is Kohl. His hair is up in a rather sloppy bun held by pencils and he's nibbling on another pencil as he stares at the paper in his hands, poison green eyes narrowed behind his glasses. Naolith is curled into a ball next to him, head on his lap and arms thrown loosely around his waist. He appears to be fast asleep)

  
Kohl: mutters to himself, glasses slipping down his nose as he crumples the paper and tosses it aside, picking up a new one**he discards this one as well, leaning back on his elbows and crossing his ankles as he sighs* Pathetic. Just pathetic.

  
Naolith: *mumbles sleepily* They're all ingenious plans, love. Testament to your overwhelming knowledge.

  
Kohl: *scowls* Ingenious, yes. Useful… hell no. *a dawning expression appears on his face* Naolith… You love me, right?

  
Naolith: *sits up and stares at Kohl through reddish brown hair* … Kohl… You aren't thinking what I think you're thinking… Are you?

  
Kohl: *snickers* Depends, love. What do you think I'm thinking?

  
Naolith: Kohl… That's illegal… And, well, wrong.

  
Kohl: *blinks* Dude, Nao… How is *leans over and whispers the plan in his ear* illegal? Wrong, I can understand but illegal?

Naolith: *blushes* I, ah, thought you meant… *blush deepens* Never mind.

  
Kohl: *blinks again then smiles* You believe the worst of me, don't you?

  
Naolith: *smiles back* Always.

  
Kohl: Aw… *hugs him* I love you.

  
Naolith: I love you too.

  
(Later, in the field where L. Seifer and L. Squall sleep, oblivious to the danger they're in from the two figures dressed in cheesy ninja outfits standing over them)

  
Kohl: *eyes his handiwork, a considering expression on his face* Something's wrong. *he frowns* but what?

  
Naolith: *blinks* Maybe because it's not what you intended…?

  
Kohl: Hm… You're right… It's worse! *smirks*

  
Naolith: Very much so. *nods*

  
Kohl: Hehe, I win!

  
Naolith: So we can go to a movie now?

  
Kohl: *blinks* Uh… I spent the last of my money on that. *points to the results of his revenge*

  
Naolith: But Kohl…

  
Kohl: DAMN IT!!! MORE NEED FOR REVENGE!! *runs away scowling*

  
Naolith: *sighs and follows* 

(The next morning in Squall and Seifer's room)

Squall: Shut up, Seifer. I don't want to hear it. All I want is for you to tell me _why_ I am here when I was in the living room and where Squall is.

Seifer: Squall-

(Seifer is cut off as a piercing scream tears through the house. Squall and Seifer jump up and head for the sound. They find L. Squall with L. Seifer's head buried under his shirt. L. Seifer is holding onto L. Squall for dear life and L. Squall appears worried)

Squall: What the f--!

Seifer: Squall!

Squall: *glares at Seifer before turning back to the boys* What the hell is going on?

L. Seifer: *lets out a muffled sob and buries his face further under L. Squall's shirt*

(Quistis, Zell, Irvine, Selphie, and Edea appear. All look extremely worried)

Quistis: What happened?

Selphie: I heard a scream and came running and--what's wrong?

Zell: Seifer, man, who you torturing this time?

Edea: Zell, that was uncalled for. Someone please explain to me what that hideous shriek was all about.

Squall: *shrugs* I don't know.

L. Squall: His hair is...

L. Seifer: *whimpers and his grip tightens*

L. Squall: *winces* He got grass stains and flower stains in his hair.

Quistis: *nose wrinkles* What?

L. Seifer: *slowly pulls his head out from under L. Squall's shirt and reveals his hair to be an odd mix of blond, pink, and a grotesque shade of green* It wasn't the grass.

Seifer: *laughs* Oh my God! Cute!

Squall: *pulls on a lock of Seifer's hair and smirks* yeah, real cute.

Seifer: *blinks*

L. Seifer: *peers up at Seifer* Well... At least I won't be suffering alone.

Seifer: WHAT?! *races back into the house. His horrified yell is heard moments later*

Squall: *snickers and pats L. Seifer on the head, ruffling his multicolored hair* You know, I don't know who you pissed off, but I'm glad you did.

L. Seifer: *bats his hand away, scowling* I bet it was that Kodak fag.

L. Squall: *blinks* Seif...

L. Seifer: *glares at him* Don't you dare...!

L. Squall: *innocently* What? Support the older, more mature, sexier one?

L. Seifer: I'LL KILL HIM! *runs into the house to plot Kohl's death*

Squall: *picks up L. Squall and turns to Edea* How long are they staying?

Edea: Until Ellone can figure out how to send them back.

Squall: *twitches* Guesstimate?

Edea: *shrugs* A couple of months, at least.

Squall: *groans* God help us all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Khyie: Heh, yeah... Most of this was written between me yelling at the guy on the lawnmower (for no reason) and calling him a prick and me walking down the hallways at school shouting "football is a product of God. Therefore it is BAD". Someone is going to like... Shoot me for my loud mouth one of these days.


End file.
